But it was not just the numbers that made me YIKES, it was what they said about the book. Even though I wrote it from a Nigerian perspective for Nigerians, it was still able to resonate miles away with people I had never seen or meet. Maybe they (the editors) were sweet talking me cause they wanted me to pick theirs bids, who knows. Whatever the case the comments were quite smashing…

And O might I add that I sent it out to like 20 of my friends. Normally my friends don’t read my manuscripts (I love you guys) but this time they are actually reading it. This must be a sign…

Anyway enough of my bragging blabbing here is some of what the critics said about the ish I wrote:

You currently have twenty three proposals and growing by the second. Usually I would bypass your job because of this. However, I am in love with your subject matter and would be delighted for the opportunity to work on your manuscript. -elance.com editor

I got to work by 6:47am today (the best way to avoid traffic) and had my breakfast by 7:15am but instead of a bowl of Kellogg’s Fruit and Fibre, I ate a big bowl of “How Intelligence Kills” served on a Dell Inspiron mini. It was a good read. I enjoyed every part of it, I loved the way it went against belief systems we hold dear and exposed the poison gland. We suspected its existence but were too lazy to locate it and suck it out. I salute your courage to go against the norm and hope more people will catch the vibe and move beyond talking about revolutions to actually leading one even with the glaring reality that you may be the only soldier in your army for a while. -Ngozi Ilondu of http://www.wyrbo.blogspot.com/

Omg, the church chapter is funny! And your mum sounds fiery. My own parents are not spiri-koko cause popsi is a muslim. So the whole tolerance and moderation stuff is practiced in my house. Oh and I thought it was just me that used to have that “something is choking me” dream. Lwkmd. Funny how I stopped seeing demons and they all went away. Lol. And yes! Those bloody questions “did you go to church? Did you pray for me?” Na wetin?! -RED

I have reviewed your sample and I am very interested in copyediting and proofreading this manuscript. I am intrigued by your writing. This is very original and I would be honored to work with you to prepare your manuscript for print. -elance.com editor

Ofili is an award winning literary writer motivational speaker, author, success coach and successful entrepreneur who blogs about life, success and entrepreneurial excellence. Follow him on twitter , facebook or subscribe to his blog for more success TIPS!” To bring Ofili to your school or organization as a speaker simply go here.

It talks about Religion, Education and Nigeria in a very frank and honest manner that I have not seen written before. It does not beat around the bush or use stories to hint at a sub-plot with an ulterior meaning. It just says it as it is as is evidence in some of the chapter titles “corruption is like sex” “how we beat the freaking creativity out of our children” and “ How Respect Might Be Killing Nigeria.”

Also thanks to all those that kept pushing me to complete the book, especially Kene Nkwontah, appreciate the constant reminders. Thanks Ngozi Ilondu and Abiola Bashorun as well. And to everyone else out there that has asked…how is your book going. Those little words have many times helped me get through a writing slump, thanks for asking. It is not done yet, as we still have to get someone to edit, layout, re-design the book cover, get testimonials, jump of a cliff…etc…

Below is the screenshot of my computer at 8:12 PM Sunday evening May 19th, 2013 when the book was officially done. Check out the chapter listing below…hope you are excited like me!

How Intelligence Kills: The Chapters
1. Foreword My Confession
2. How Intelligence Kills Us (Part 1)
3. The Akpos Dilenma: Is He Stupid Or Not
4. How We Beat The Freaking Creativity Out Of Our Kids
5. We Come In Peace
6. How I Got My Driver’s License
7. Corruption Is Like Sex
8. Hug People And Not Just Those With Big Boobs (Eye Service Wan Kill Us)
9. How Ajebuta’s Could Save Nigeria
10. If You Are An Asshole In Real Life Social Media
11. A Nation Is Not Great Because It Prays But Rather…
12. Shuffering and Shmiling: The Addiction Begins
13. Our Dangerous Addiction To Religion
14. The Best Religion In The World
15. Why All Great Businesses Should Tell Great Lies
16. Who The Heck Kidnapped Mr.Biggs And Stole His Jelly
17. The Trash Can That Was Too Small
18. 4 Things That Happen When Shit Happens In Nigeria
19. Our Fundamental Right To Shit With Dignity
20. Its A National Crisis When A Nation Can’t Spell National Crisis
21. What I Learned About Nigeria When (Dana) Crashed
22. My Beef With Things Fall Apart
23. Biafra: How Engineering Saved My Father’s Life
24. An Hausa man, A Yoruba Man and An Igbo Man
25. How Respect Might Be Killing Nigeria
26. How Intelligence Kills Us (Part 2 The Crime Scene)
27. Conclusion: Why Our Educational System Is A Death Trap And 7 Ways To Fix It
28. The Call To Action: My Letter To My Generation
29. Advance Praise I mean Insult For How Intelligence Kills

Ofili is an award winning literary writer motivational speaker, author, success coach and successful entrepreneur who blogs about life, success and entrepreneurial excellence. Follow him on twitter , facebook or subscribe to his blog for more success TIPS!” To bring Ofili to your school or organization as a speaker simply go here.

During most of March and April I have had serious electricity and water issues in my house.  This makes a person completely desperate and makes them vulnerable to everything.  You feel like doing absolutely nothing because in some ways you can’t actually do anything.  You go to get yourself food but you can’t wash your hands or wash the food or cook the food (no electricity) and in the end all the food ends up spoiling! Not to mention that you can’t bathe, you can’t flush your toilet, and you are constantly hot and sweaty because there’s no light (this is what we called ‘electricity in Nigeria).

Up until yesterday, the water situation was so bad that I’d been taking bucket baths.  Something that I am so not used to doing at all.  And in my present condition isn’t even advisable or good for me.

I am in limbo at the moment, trying to get things sorted out, fall into place and to come together.  I am really relying on God to see me through at this time.

Nigeria is getting me down these days.  Not that life is ‘so bad’ or anything but everyone is so apathetic and accepts things as they are.  This can be so hard for me.  Things shouldn’t be this way, people shouldn’t just say okay, or just say, ‘well, that’s Nigeria for you…’  This apathy is exactly the reason why things just won’t change!  It makes me so tired and exhausted.  Abuja recently put in working traffic lights, but sometimes people refuse to obey them and then the whole thing is completely worthless.  You get these terrible tangled cobweb traffic jams that can take an hour to get out of for no reason. Nigeria can and should be better.

Everyone at the top should be ashamed and everyone at the bottom should be screaming.  It’s no wonder that organizations like Boko Haram (no matter how crazy their ideals are to me) and MEND exist.  Sometimes, I wonder why there aren’t more outspoken figures and groups.  Sometimes, I wonder why the police themselves don’t rise up against and fight for their rights.  They are the ones that are on the streets supposedly ‘taking care of business’ and they are given enough power to frustrate the average citizen but not enough to make change and their own salaries are so small that they too must be corrupt and take from the average citizen to survive and feed their families…

Something has got to give…

God help us all.

One American woman’s true story of life in Nigeria living as an expat. I butcher the local languages every day, I stand out everywhere I go, but everyday there’s a new adventure that lies ahead. This is my Nigerian Life.

For more of my language butchering and NEPA cursing analysis adventures visit my blog at http://thisnigerianlife.blogspot.com/

Picture of little girl courtesy of http://lagosisland.forumotion.net/t323-faces-of-nigeria-nigerian-teens

See the rules below and let me know what you thinketh…

1. If you are in love with an idea you are no judge of its beauty or value.
2. It is difficult to see the whole picture when you are inside the frame. (love this)
3. After learning the tricks of the trade don’t think you know the trade.
4. We hear and apprehend what we already know.
5. The dog that stays on the porch will find no bones.
6. Never state a problem to yourself in the same terms it was brought to you.
7. If its off beat or surprising its probably useful.
8. If you do not expect the unexpected, you will not find it.
9. Don’t get too serious.
10. If you hit the bulls-eye every time…the target is too near! (my fav)

Ofili is an award winning literary writer motivational speaker, author, success coach and successful entrepreneur who blogs about life, success and entrepreneurial excellence. Follow him on twitter , facebook or subscribe to his blog for more success TIPS!” To bring Ofili to your school or organization as a speaker simply go here.

I never understood why he waited till I was 30 before telling me stories of the war, maybe he wanted me to be a bit mature. To be honest that would not have been a surprise because many of the stories he told were heart-wrenching and cringe worthy. Such as the stories of the pogrom where people were slaughtered en-masse and their dead bodies loaded onto trains and sent into villages in the East or the time when a Young Doctor arrived home from work only to be sprayed to death by the random bullets of the Russian MIG planes. I always wondered how he remembered the exact type of air-craft that was attacking them, but as more stories unfolded, I began to realize that airplanes and sporadic shooting had begun a daily part of life in the East. Much like NEPA taking light is routine, aircraft’s spraying villages and cities with bullets was normal.

So normal was the occurrence that it led to some funny stories. I remember the story about a church marriage. The couple had just made their wedding vows and topped it off with the classic phrase “for better for worse” when a Russian MIG airplane probably sent by God to test their faith…began spraying church. By the time the commotion had subsided, the church was in tatters. And the newly wedded couple? The groom had completely disappeared, leaving his wife behind in the church. I guess for better or worse did not include 100’s of bullets falling from the sky.

PART II
Now it was agreed that in the advent of an attack on Port-Harcourt, that all the refinery engineers and technicians would meet up in the Imo city of Owerrinta (which means small Owerri). These arrangements were made because engineers and technicians were prized assets in the war. So their movement and security was paid special attention. At Owerrinta they met with the local Nigerian engineers from the Shell production companies. These were the people responsible for providing the oil that the refinery processed. All of them were eventually moved to Uzoakoli secondary school, where a quasi-research team from Shell Nigeria and BP Nigeria had already began building a refinery.
(Now at this point I interrupt my Dad, to ensure that he knows what he is saying…cause I did not believe it was possible to build a refinery under those circumstances, it was a war, and they had only been taught about how a refinery worked but not to build it!)

But my Dad insisted that they did actually build a refinery, they were able to build it from salvaged parts from the old refinery and scrap metals that were welded together.

The first refinery had already been built before my Dad’s team had got there, but still they had a chance to influence the design of the refinery as they had first hand knowledge on how a refinery was operated. The new refinery was eventually completed and they were able to independently get it functioning and refining oil…

Excerpt from my latest book “Our Dangerous Addiction To Intelligence” coming sooon…I swear…real soon…definitely will be out before NEPA stops taking light in your House =D

In my head, I pictured all the war movies I had seen and I thought they were all lining up at the borders…fighting to get away as the whole country exploded behind them. But now I know better. I didn’t understand because I grew smarter, but because, well, I live it. Most days. Or every month at least.

Nigeria, my country, is now a place where bombings have become the routine. I remember the first time I heard about a bombing in Nigeria. I thought it was some sort kind of mistake and that it happened on the border or something like that, but definitely not Nigeria. I mean, the logic is that we love ourselves way too much to consider suicide.

Anyhow, we all wrote it off as some sort of fluke, those random unexplainable actions of a person or persons that was most likely not really Nigerian and that it would end as suddenly as it started. But it only got worse. Boko Haram went from a dreaded name, to a joke because that’s us, we kind of turn everything to a joke. I suppose jokes are easier to handle, especially for those of us that don’t live or work in the North or have family up there.

It was basically, just you all keep it right above the 1914 amalgamation line, and we’re all good. But it’s really not…all good!

I actually wonder what people think when they hear about Nigeria now. Will they know that we still go to school or work everyday as if nothing happened and no one declares mourning days for those blasts anymore? And that we live our lives quite normally and that things go on as if its all fun and games while our only reactions to the blasts would probably be a tweet or two with maybe a sad face smiley?

Yes, of course we’re all clamoring to leave, not as dramatically as I imagined as a child, but in an equally desperate way?

We’re all living in denial. It might be hard for us to reconcile our image of one people, great nation, beautiful Nigeria, blah blah with that of a war-torn middle-eastern country, but we’re quite close in my opinion, and if we’re not careful, we’ll get there…if we are not already there.

Truth is, we’re a lot like those countries. I mean there’s the rot, the corruption and of course the clueless leader the whole world, including us ridicules.

I was born in Kano State. I lived there till I was 11. My father is a Muslim and I have Muslim friends. This problem has gone beyond religion and states of origin. We have all simply stopped caring for our fellow humans. We have become numb and now simply shrug and move on. After all, we have our individual problems, Each person to his own. And if a group of people keep killing themselves or others somewhere, its their business. As far as its not people I know personally or in my backyard. Sounds good. But remember, one day, they’ll be through with the North, and they will cross that line. And then we’ll see how silent everyone will be.

So sit there and say stupid things like “If Nigeria no spoil, who go hammer.”
We all just have to say No. Together. Muslim, Christian, North and South. Rich and Poor. Both those that can afford to run out of the country when shit gets real, and those who can’t. Let’s be our brother’s keepers. Not just with prayers. We’ve prayed quite enough I think, now is the time to simply refuse to sit by, close our eyes and watch our fellow Nigerians get slaughtered.

I like Nigeria…I really want to be proud to be a Nigerian. Nigeria a nation filled with people who stand up for others despite their differences, people who can see past religion and petty ethnicity. People who can feel empathy. Not just numb, suffering and smiling people. Because it seems that’s what we do these days. Suffer and bloody smile about it.

Let’s stop smiling and start acting!

Article written by RED…

Approximately 20 years ago, RED crashed into planet Earth from Mars. She was meant to crash into yankee, but somehow ended up in Nigeria. She has no regrets being in Nigeria, but fights actively against the decay and rot in Nigeria especially in its Universities. To be honest, RED cannot really fight…cause she loves peace. So instead of fighting she writes and uses her words as a weapon to create change in Nigeria. And she won’t stop typing until…

Not the case for Nigeria…a bomb blasts happens and we could careless about the victims our focus is on MEND or BokoHaram or whether this is the sign of the end times. Our journalists, the bloggers and many of us including myself rarely stop to ask about the victims. What their families are going through or even who they are…what their names were. Nothing. It is like they never existed…

Now I know, someone would tell me…what about Dana. We knew the victims.

But Dana is a lazy exception…we knew the victims not because of any journalistic effort. But simply because the air flight list was readily available and the names could be googled and facebooked from the comfort of our laptops. But not the case for the thousands of Bokoharam or MEND victims whose names did not appear on a prepped manifest.

The blasts occurs and we lament and then move on swiftly. We barely know nothing about the victims, we barely see their pictures, we don’t know what they liked, what they ate, sometimes we don’t even know who they are.

We could blame this on a couple of reasons, from a non-existent national ID system. I mean you can walk into a national airport with any plastic card with your picture and name and you will be let on an aircraft…but I digress. I digress because the issue is not ID system, it is journalistic laziness mixed with a lack of empathy…poeple just don’t care! We don’t care enough to investigate to see what the families are going through. We know more about the victims of the US 911 terror attacks than we know of the victims of the Bokoharam bomb blasts, except when the victim happens to be a politician. But for the ordinary Nigerian…nothing!

And why…why can’t we focus on our victims. Why can’t we hear their tales, their stories, their struggles. Why don’t we ever hear of the thousands of Nigerian helpers that rushed to help victims, the organizations that took time to help out.
And no I am not talking about the celebrity that swings in to drop a cartoon of rice with a camera crew on hand to record the event as the celebrity checks the charity mark. I am talking about the ordinary Nigerians. The people are at the scene helping…how come we never hear their stories.

If we are to eradicate this nonsense and give Nigerians the belief they are important, that their lives are important we would have to start giving our victims faces. We would have to start raising them higher than the Bokos tormenting Nigeria. Because we need to shift focus so that we know more about the victims and not cowards that terrorize people.

Let’s hope we can copy the western example common sense approach. So that our victims will no longer be faceless!

Writing dedicated to the victims of mindless and cowardice terror attacks across the world. 

Ofili is an award winning motivational speaker, author, success coach and pissed off entrepreneur who blogs about life, success and entrepreneurial excellence. Follow him on twitter , facebook or subscribe to his blog for more success TIPS!” To bring Ofili to your school or organization as a speaker simply go here.

I know this for a fact…I have attended several book readings in African and they normally are carbon copies of the previous one. The writer is talking about one imaginary village in one corner of Nigeria or Africa. The big words are spilled mercilessly and liberally across each paragraph, the only rest we get is not from comma’s or full stops in the book but when the author or authoress pauses to adjust their large traditional attire or dreads that got in the way of the words.

Sadly this carbon copying phenomenon is not limited to only fiction writers, non-fiction writers are even worse. If you dare write a non-fiction book without quoting 5-7 bible verses you are toast! No publisher will look at your book. Now I am not against bible spilling verses in books, but after sometime it becomes quite overwhelming and quite fake. And then the testimonials! Let me not even go there…ok ok let me go there…if you don’t get testimonials from the top 2 or 3 motivational speakers in Nigeria your book is not complete. At least that what most authors think as they stalk and sometimes buy testimonials from these motivational guru’s. And for what so they can have that authentication that their book is like every other book out there!

I mean, why does every writer have to be the same as the next. Why can’t they be different?

Why can’t you be different? Why can’t you write a story set not in a village but in outer space? Why can’t you show up to your book readings decked up in cute hot and sexy dress! Why can’t your lead character have special powers like those mutants in x-men? Why? Why can’t our book stores have a variety of books with different settings and messages instead of the same old ish?

I have no idea why to be honest…I just know that my goal is to tell people out there that it is okay to be different, to write differently, to sound differently and to dress differently. Because the world appreciates uniquenss and the world appreciates you.

Keep writing and remember whatever you do…write different

Ofili is an award winning literary writer motivational speaker, author, success coach and successful entrepreneur who blogs about life, success and entrepreneurial excellence. Follow him on twitter , facebook or subscribe to his blog for more success TIPS!” To bring Ofili to your school or organization as a speaker simply go here.

Ofili is an award winning music artist motivational speaker, author, success coach and grammy winning entrepreneur who blogs about life, success and entrepreneurial excellence. Follow him on twitter , facebook or subscribe to his blog for more success TIPS!” To bring Ofili to your school or organization as a speaker simply go here.

Ofili is an award winning music artist motivational speaker, author, success coach and grammy winning entrepreneur who blogs about life, success and entrepreneurial excellence. Follow him on twitter , facebook or subscribe to his blog for more success TIPS!” To bring Ofili to your school or organization as a speaker simply go here.